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A year later.... a lot has changed

Jun. 26th, 2008 | 10:29 am

It's been 53 weeks since I've made an entry. So much has changed. I'm not in Pullman anymore- I moved in with my boyfriend of a year and a half in Spokane. I'm finishing up school through the online classes WSU offers. I'm deeply in love- and am very happy. We live in a house together, and have been having a lot of fun updating it room by room. The house is too big for us, but hopefully we can make money off of it when we move out. Its four bedrooms, soon-to-be two baths, with a shop as big as the house. Its nice. I got a job at a bakery/cafe place up here called Rocket Bakery... its been a lot of fun too! I am just working on making some new friends... thats the only part I have any complaints about.. but i think that just takes time.

I guess I didn't have as much to update on as I thought I did!

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bubble and squeak

Jun. 14th, 2007 | 10:43 am

Well, I'm an official Junior in college... how intense.

I remember when I was a little kid I told my Dad summer was forever.
He told me every year goes by faster and faster as you get older.
He was absolutly right.
I still can remember being sixteen and driving around Ward Parkway like it was a week ago.
Of course, I only remember the good things..

I wonder if that's how college will be for me.
Last year I was a little messed up still. Maybe messed up isn't the right way to describe it.. I was lonely. It was a year of growing and maturation for me.
I really think I am a better person now than I ever have been before.
..or at least a happier one.
There were plenty of nights spent crying in my room.
I didn't sleep so I wouldn't have to face that moment of laying in bed thinking about my feelings.

I'm glad I don't smoke cigaretts anymore. They smell bad and make my lungs hurt.
Athsmatics shouldn't smoke anyways.

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Ive got the hotts for awkward boys

Jun. 25th, 2006 | 04:42 pm

I just realized that the AIM profile message on this computer gives a link to my livejournal. Hehe, I used to use this livejournal as a normal blog but then ended up just typing in it when I was really upset about stuff because hardly anyone knows about this. Welllll, when I realized anyone and everyone could have been reading it-- I thought I better go through and see what it was that they read.

....and I learned a bit about myself: IM A FREAKIN MAN HATER! I always hated those people and when only going on what my livejournal says I give a damn good impression of one. Also I realized that there is ALWAYS guy drama in my life-- and I take full responsibility for that. I like guys who are weird though- and I think that is where the drama comes in. I like people who dont make any effing sense and usually the guys I date are very arrogant. arrogance coupled with not making sense get to be very annoying, but hell, Im addicted to it. haha.
How odd.
Well-- these days there isnt much drama in my life of any sort, especially of the guy type. Zack and I are good friends again, which makes me happier than I can even get to make sense in writing. I have no love interest of any sort at the moment and its exhaulting. (is that an okay way to use that word?-- I dont know) but its so nice not wasting time thinking about relationships that end up being more trouble than they were worth in the first place.

I say this now-- but probably the next time Im bummed out and post something in here it'll be man-drama. Its a vicious cycle, Im in the empowered woman stage right now ;)

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Long time, no type!

May. 28th, 2006 | 03:58 am

Its been a while..
There isnt a ton new with my life since the last time I updated though- and thats a bit sad. A relationshop has come and gone and Im still alive, so thats cool.
I left pullman and got to OH yesterday- already kinda miss it. But Im leaving for california this week and then from cali Im headed to Kansas city for the rest of the summer- who knows how that is going to turn out.
Im giving my brother my laptop for the summer so I dont know when I'll be online once I give this thing up-- probably wont get another update for a long long time....
but no worries, there is always a cell phone ;)

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I've learned my lesson

Feb. 22nd, 2006 | 09:15 am
mood: blahblah

If I were a normal person there would be this guy that I was totally into. But since Im not a normal person Im just stuck in a weird feeling. Im way too scared to like any guy because Im not willing to get hurt more. So--- in my head Im just going to keep reminding myself that he doesnt care about me and that hes just a friend unless he proves me wrong to the point where I dont think hes going to toy with my feelings.
Its so lame, but I expect the worst out of guys right now. Everything they say I assume is insincere and I dont count on any promises they make or plans we talk about because I figure that in a few weeks its going to be all fucked up anyways.
I feel so jaded, untrusting and cold.

My livejournal always sounds so emo. I dont want the reader to think that Im a big depressed kid all the time-- cause Im really not. I usually only write in my lj when Im feeling down and want to vent-- Overall life is pretty great.

Im just soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sick of dating people. Its not very fun at all.

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pearl jam

Feb. 22nd, 2006 | 03:13 am
mood: lonelylonely

I know someday you'll have a beautiful life,
I know you'll be a star in somebody else's sky, but why
Why, why can't it be, why can't it be mine?

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My Sweet Rapture

Feb. 10th, 2006 | 10:23 am

okay, so everything is okay.
I cant believe its already mid-february!!! I hope that all of college doesnt fly by this fast-- because this is insane!
Tonight the ladies are hittin the town-- we're going out to a fancy dinner and then drinkiing a bit... Saturday I work the whole night- but thats okay because I love my job probably more than I should. Sunday Im going to sit around and try not to move very much and get ready for another exciting week!
So thats my life in case you were curious..


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Im an emo kid.

Feb. 6th, 2006 | 11:41 am

Stabby Rip Stab Stab.
My life is a black abyss, and its suffocating me.

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my dear lj

Feb. 4th, 2006 | 08:13 pm
mood: crankycranky
music: CALICO SYSTEM - Love Will Kill All

I love my livejournal... this is the place where I can post my real feelings and happenings because almost nobody reads it. Well, wanna hear something fucked up? One of my best friends here at school fucked around with that guy I've been writing about last night........

Im not going to get upset over it because obviously neither of them are people worth getting upset over if they can be that sleazy.

So, today I got a tattoo and tonight Im going out to a party with this super hot guy and Im gonna just try to forget that those two people who I really cared about toallllllllly let me down.

I wrote this one day as an away message for AOL and right now Im reading it over and over because I need to remind myself to live the things I say....

"p e a c e.
people need to be reminded that most of the time the things that bother us are not worth getting so upset over."

Sometimes I say things that make a lot of sense... I just need to remind myself that I said those things when Im upset and need them.

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(no subject)

Feb. 4th, 2006 | 02:22 am

Wow, I guess I've got to realize it at some point.... Im just flat out not very happy.
Why is it so hard to find someone to be with?
Why do people lie so much?
I feel like I cant trust anyone right now.....

So how am I dealing with it? Im not. Im sitting in my room on a friday night sipping a mikes listening to iron and wine.

wow, Im way cool.

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